Can I still lose while on the booze?

Q Seeing Alvey in the TV series Kingdom made me wonder whether alcohol and fat loss really are mutually exclusive. In your opinion, what’s the best alcohol when trying to lose fat?

A Asking which is the best alcohol when trying to lose fat is like asking which is the best supercar when trying to stick to the speed limit. It’s possible but unlikely.

For those who haven’t watched Kingdom, Alvey is a former professional MMA fighter with two adult children who runs a local fighting gym. Played by Frank Grillo, Alvey is in Hollywood shape.

Kingdom is a tribute to dysfunction. Alvey is portrayed drinking whiskey as if it were water, scowling through hungover eyes at everything he destroys. Yet, his shirt comes off and his six-pack abs are ever-present.

We will remind you of a scene midway through season one where he is seen injecting something into the minimal adipose tissue on his abs, most likely to imply growth hormone. Perhaps that was his secret?

Dear reader, it is fiction. That wasn’t really whiskey. In fact, Grillo the actor probably packed himself full of antioxidant-rich herbal tea, coloured like whiskey, to sell the illusion of Alvey’s functional alcoholism to the cameras.

If you or I tried to live like Alvey, our kingdom, like his, would involve broken families, broken hearts, broken homes, broken careers, broken livers, broken kidneys and broken dreams.

Alcohol will disrupt your best-laid plans. Sleeping off a hangover is easier than waking up and attempting a run.

It will disrupt your diet —a midnight binge is far more likely with a few drinks down the hatch. Ultimately, your decision-making will be affected, and you must live with the consequences.

Why build a routine over months of dedication only for it to go up in smoke?

Over the years, I have been let down by friends who had one too many the night before and sent a one-sentence text cancellation just before an early-morning run or workout. I have also been guilty of sleeping instead of running because of dinner turning into a party. Few personal bests other than disappointment are broken that way.

Peter Bills wrote a book about the All Blacks called The Jersey. In a review written for Business Day three years ago, I wrote: “Perhaps one piece of bittersweet consolation for long-suffering South Africans is that Bills pinpoints a single moment in SA in 2004 that played an immense role in the All Blacks becoming the behemoth they are today. The sight of neatly dressed Springboks placing disgraced, vomiting and incoherent All Blacks into the recovery position on the lawn of a fivestar hotel in Johannesburg lit a fire in Henry’s eyes and New Zealand’s belly that would burn the rest of the world for the next 14 years.”

Coach Graham Henry knew that alcohol abuse and success seldom exist in harmony. But what if you can drink responsibly and enjoy a few tots now and then?

When you have alcohol in your system, your body will be more focused on breaking it down than burning fat. Besides that, most alcoholic drinks are packed with empty calories, no nutritional value but still capable of packing on weight. If that’s not enough, if you drink too much you can say goodbye to your testosterone levels, which will affect lean muscle mass and the ability to lose weight.

Presuming none of the above applies to you and being the responsible Business Day reader you are, the Water Cooler will answer your question.

According to Everyday Health — and supported by peer-reviewed research — the five best alcohol options when weight gain is a concern are: red wine, light beer, dry Martini, spirits on the rocks (Alvey was right) and champagne. All of these have between 80 and 100 calories a serving.

The worst types of alcohol, according to the same source, are sugary cocktails, beach drinks and craft beer — basically the good stuff.

If you are serious about your fitness and weight management, rather than finding short cuts, focus on doing it properly. If you do drink alcohol, do so moderately and responsibly, especially now that you have an extra day to buy it.